I always want to know the 'why' of things. When I believe in the foundations of a thing, I understand how to make it better, and how to fix it if it goes wrong. In that spirit, I thought I'd write a bit about the 'why' of mindfulness: why it helps us to feel more at home in our bodies.
Anyone who's struggled with their mental health will agree that it sometimes feels more like a physical illness. You may struggle with chest pains and a racing heart, or you may feel exhausted for 'no reason' and even struggle to keep your balance.
These symptoms are our bodies' reactions to perceived danger. Our ancestors evolved 'fight or flight' reflexes, as well as 'freeze' and 'flop' reflexes, among others. These responses helped to keep our species safe against predators. Nowadays, we're not running from sabre-toothed tigers, but our brains retain the same architecture.
All this may give you disdainful feeling - like our brains and bodies should get with the program, and stop making us feel bad. But frustrating though it can be, it doesn't help to struggle against ourselves. The only way to get your nervous system back to regulation is to convince it that you're safe.
One powerful way to regulate yourself when you are hyper aroused (a.k.a, chest tight, heart racing, restless) is to focus on your breathing. The 'in' breath is stimulating and will increase your heart rate, but the 'out' breath is soothing and will signal that it's okay to relax. So if you can, it helps to make your 'out' breath longer.
On the other hand, if you find yourself feeling hypo aroused (a.k.a., slumped, exhausted, spaced out) mindfully engaging with your senses can encourage your nervous system back to a place of regulation. Gentle movements such as wiggling your toes or progressively tensing and relaxing your muscles can also help.
However you're feeling, adopting a curious and compassionate attitude towards yourself is the key to creating a sense of safety. Try pairing the techniques above with some affirmations, such as 'I'm safe, I'm okay, this won't last forever.' Or, if you can, try and introduce a sense of play to your mindfulness. See how it feels to blow raspberries, or to pull funny faces! Don't be afraid to experiment.
I hope this has been interesting for you! I'd love to hear more ways that you've been able to get yourself regulated.
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